Carolyn Wing Greenlee


My friend Dan adopted an ex-racer, a sleek red fawn greyhound that he named Sonny Boy. In the instructions that came with the dog was the warning that the owner should be careful to choose a good quality dog food and avoid certain foods because “greyhound gas is indescribable.”

Today I received this report from Dan:

I made a big mistake. I cooked Sonny’s turkey along with mine, and without thinking I cooked his with garlic, too. Well, some hours later I can tell you that the gas coming out of this dog would end a hostage situation in seconds. It has to be strong enough to liquefy diamonds, or at least weaken steel. I went outside to get away from it, but when I opened the door to go out, three bats and an owl dropped from the sky, dead. I feel responsible somehow.

Unbelievable! Indescribable!

It wasn't me.


  1. Patty

    January 16, 2011 - 11:16 PM

    That is a toxic combination on many dogs! I am laughing still at Dan’s description!

  2. Carolyn

    January 16, 2011 - 7:29 PM

    One of my friends asked if Sonny had been back East lately. He hasn’t, but I wouldn’t underestimate the potency of his toxic emissions! Just think…an army of greyhounds could bring peace to the world. All they need is turkey and garlic. Talk about chemical warfare!

  3. Betty Helf

    January 16, 2011 - 4:50 PM

    That must have been the same day that my dishwasher started acting up. BAD DOG!


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